001: Bella Mackie

Welcome to Brief Encounters, a new interview series where I interview some of Stripe & Stare’s favourite writers and entertainers about the contents of their knicker drawer. Think of it as Who Do You Think You Are? in undercrackers.

I bloody love a knicker - and a Stripe & Stare one, at that. I met Stripe & Stare years ago - they were an early supporter of The High Low, and I will forever be grateful for their sponsorship - and I’ve worn nothing else, ever since. (Except for the clothes on top of them.) Fun fact: the special Lenzing modal that they use (which makes them 2-3 times comfier than other knickers, according to 98% of customers) somehow, dramatically reduces wedgies. Less knicker picking = a happier life for me.

Bella, welcome to Brief Encounters! Would you describe yourself as a knicker enthusiast, knicker expert, or knicker agnostic?

Mentally, I’m am enthusiast, and buy a lot of nice pairs in a wide array of colours and fabrics but in practise, I’m a novice failure. I wear the comfy pants, whatever they are and almost always eschew the fancy ones which sit forlornly in the drawer wondering what they did wrong.  

I think I’m the same. There is no point pretending that I will reach for anything other than comfort, at this point. What is your first knicker memory – was there a pair that stole your heart?

When I started buying my own pants in my late teens, I somehow inexplicably decided to wear beige ones which went up above my belly button. My friends spotted them when I bent over one day and never let me live it down. They’d buy me sexy knickers in a vain attempt to wean me off the granny pants.

That is riveting, normally people start with the gross skimpies and graduate to beige. I like that you were the maverick. What are your favourite knickers to wear now?

Seamless thong every time.

You’re a thong girl! I’m looking at you with new, admiring eyes.

Absolutely. Thongs get a bad rap. I blame the 90s.

Do you ever flirt with a high-waist or a bikini brief?

Bikini. I am short-waisted and still have the lingering memory of being laughed at for my granny pants.

My heart twangs at that. What is your biggest underwear no-no?

Boy shorts. No, no, no. Cut you on the hips and on the cheeks. Not for me.

Also hideous on me. To get even up closer and personal: how many pairs of knickers do you own?

If I don’t count the fancy ones which stay in the drawer plotting their escape, maybe 30 pairs of pants.

How do you categorise them - do you have like a Monica ‘towel, fancy towel’ situation but for knickers?

My husband takes up all the drawers so I have one which has to handle pants, socks, tights bras and the rest. Every day is a scrabble.

I love that he takes up all the drawers! I want to do a whole interview with him and his bountiful pant situ now. How often do you purge your underwear drawer?

When I find a pair of lacy pants which I remember buying over a decade ago, I fish them out and say a solemn goodbye. Daily thongs probably have a one year shelf life.

I find I only purge mine when I have grown out of the knickers in question. Which is strange because aside from pregnancy I am the same size. I imagine the knickers change, not me, but that’s not a given. Anyway, I’ve got some fun underwear facts for you:

-  King Tut was buried with 145 pairs of underwear.

-  Carrie Fisher never wore underwear while filming Star Wars, because George Lucas convinced her there was no underwear in space

-  15% of women own underwear that’s between 5 and 9 years old.

Tell me a fun fact about knickers.

Paper knickers were a marketing thing for a while, advertised to women who travelled a lot. Rustling = sexy.

Oh yes that is good. Like wearing the knickers you get when (if) you get a wax. Now, I remember you once found a pair of knickers down the leg of your leggings. After you’d completed your run. Or was it a sock?

It was a pair of pants. Still amazing to me.

Has Barney [Bella and her husband Greg’s dog] ever eaten your knickers?

No, but my old dog used to bring knickers down stairs to greet every new guest who came through the door. Sometimes a bra if you were
really special.

That is very flirty. What knickers do you think Grace [from Bella’s novel, How To Kill Your Family] would have worn, to kill her family? Do you reckon she had some Killing Eve-style power pants?

I reckon she didn’t wear pants. Didn’t need ‘em. That goes for bras too. She would want to be unencumbered.

That’s fair enough, she had a lot of things on her mind, best to streamline. Okay, so I have a real problem with wedgies. I wrote an entire piece for a newspaper about it once, which is journalism I prefer not to think about. Do you ever suffer from upthebumitis?

Every pant I have ever owned eventually goes up my bum. It must be the size or shape of the bum. Drives me nuts. Hence the thongs.

They are not paying me to say this, but I do recommend Stripe & Stare, whom I discovered when I did an entire field trip into the pant for the aforementioned newspaper piece - they’ve dramatically reduced my wedgies. So, Americans are really thrown by the word ‘knickers’. They call them panties. But I think if you said ‘panties’ over here people would look at you in horror. My mum calls them undercrackers. Do you have any weird names for pants?

My mum always called them kecks - Scottish and sounds better I think.

What are your views on men’s pants. Boxers, boxer briefs, or Y-fronts?

Who says Y-fronts! Briefs, I think.

Have you ever dumped a man over his pants?

No! Shoes: yes. Pants: no. Usually they show you their best until you’re in love and it’s too late.

Inspired by Brief Encounters 001

The Stripe & Stare products we couldn't stop thinking about whilst reading this interview. From beige 'granny pants' to Bella's go-to shape, the thong.